i am kinda freaking out here ... i can't believe the job i moved out here for ... the job where i met david ... is over ... i really thought i would have that job till i deceided not to work anymore ... i mean we used to be above a day care center ... i already saw myself planning for children ... and the way things are going in life right now i may never have a child ... let alone get married ... and these are two things i would really like to experience ... and now i am unemployeed ... i see how bummed out david is about not having a job ... shit with both of us here ... isn't that going to bum him out even more ... oh shit i need to stop thinking about it ... maybe just enjoy this time i have to myself ... i keep telling david to do that ... maybe i need to take my own advice ... :)