You know the scene in My Cousin Vinny when they are on the porch of the cabin ... Lisa is going through the speech about her biological clock and Vinny goes through a long list of things that are piling up stressing him out and asks, "What more could we possibly pile up on the outcome of this case?" ... that is how I am feeling ...
Today is 99 days till I get married ... the list of stuff I have to do is getting longer rather than shorter ... some of the things I can't do until orders come in ... some of the things I am still trying to figure out how to do them ... we have no honeymoon planned and it turned out some of the mileage we were going to use to pay for things we aren't getting ... so it is just so much on top of so much on top of so much ...
and to make things even worse ... it is this time last year that we had the BATS ... and I am nervous wreck at home ... every time Kramer freaks I freak ... when I hear wings flap [hopfully they are from birds] I jump up and run ... bats bats bats ... I can't deal with them again this year ...
I think the point I am trying to make is that I am just too fucking stressed out right now ... I am dieting and working out like a fucking maniac and I am getting very little support from the people around me and it is hard ... I am down 35 pounds but I don't believe I have even lost one pants size cause everything still fits just fine ...
and all the people around me are complaining about all sorts of shit but no one is having time to listen to me ... and I need that so badly ... I am sick of listening to everyone else ...
my birthday was on Sunday and it came and went without incidence ... I realize we were all dealing with a bit too much death last week but I fucking live for my birthday ... and it was just a nothing day at all ...
ok my pity party is over ... I gotta go figure out why my arm is hurting me so badly ... and it feels like it is asleep ... hummmmmmmm
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