My Days - Wish vs. Have

How I wish my days went:

WISH:
- Wake up early
- Shower
- Get Curly Top Up
- Have breakfast together
- TV time for Curly Top while I straighten up and be able to do a bit of cleaning each day
- Head out for the day doing errands and going to do fun stuff with Curly Top
- Home to play, get some work done
- Make dinner for my family
- Reading time
- Bath
- Bedtime
- Straighten up from the day
- Do my own stuff that makes me happy

HAVE:
- Wake up really early to a totally disorganized and messy house
- Shower (if I am up early enough)
- Straighten up kitchen
- Make coffee
- Answer emails and take care of stuff for one of my 3 jobs (Office job, D's scheduling, RnT)
- Pack lunch (can't afford to buy lunch)
- Spend somewhere around an hour in beltway traffic getting to work
- Work while still trying to make appointments, take care of paying our bills, figuring out what needs to be done on the weekend cause I am in an office when any public buildings are open (post office, bank etc.)
- Try to connect for a bit with D over chat
- At least one phone call to D and Curly Top so she can at least hear my voice sometime during the 21 hours a day I don't see her
- Squeeze in response emails for jobs for D, along with setting his schedule, making arrangements for Curly Top, billing customers
- Do all the things that are required to run RnT, sneak in phone calls to potential people for events, work on website, search for things to make RnT better, worry about ticket sales, find ways to increase sales yadda yadda yadda
- Make sure I do enough at work to keep my job
- Pack it up and shut down the office
- Get in the car for at least an hour home in beltway traffic (on a good day)
- Half the time stop somewhere to pick up something on the way home ... milk, prescription dropped off earlier, gas ... something to make my time coming home longer
- Arrive home to house I still haven't cleaned
- Get to see a super excited Curly Top
- Head outside for some bubble time and running around the yard
- Take turns in the kitchen with D preparing dinner
- Try and straighted up something so I kid myself into believing I have made an effort
- All sit down to dinner
- Unload dishwasher from the morning and clean up all dinner stuff
- TV and reading time with Curly Top
- Try and get her to clean up some toys
- Bath time
- Bed time
- Log onto computer for more work on D's business, more RnT work, check my actual job email, start making a list of all the things that need to get done before going to bed
- Stay up usually till 1:00 AM working on all sorts of things none of which are my fun projects that I wish I were working on
- Clean up the rest of the toys
- Debate making coffee for the next morning and talk myself out of it cause I am too tired (regret it in the morning when there isn't coffee waiting for me - promise not to do that again but probably will)

Then on the weekends I have to fit in:
- 7 loads of laundry
- 2 hours of putting away laundry
- make up for missing 105 hours with Curly Top during the week
- try and find something for the family to do at least one day during the weekend
- attempt to clean but usually get distracted from what needs to be done so I am back to waking up to a messy and dirty house Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday morning

Truthfully there is so much more but it is tiring me out thinking of it all ... especially being a Friday and getting ready to attempt the weekend stuff ...

How can what I want and what I have be so far away from each other?