woohoo ... snow day!!!!!!!

Help Gregg Clare raise money for Ride for the Feast ... he is doing all the work [riding his bike 140 miles in 2 days] he just needs your contributions and every little bit will help ... so go here and pledge whatever you can!!

When I was 16 and getting my drivers license I often wondered what life would be like when I was 32 ... it seemed so far off but at 32 I would have been driving for as long as I hadn't ... I wondered how access to a car would change my life ...


before 16 when I wanted to see The Grateful Dead my dad would drop my brother and I and some friends off at Irvine Meadows ... we would usually go all 3 days they were there ... and I once we camped out there for the weekend ...


after 16 I followed The Dead for countless summers ... loading up my Jeep with my shit and anyone who wanted to go and have a blast driving around the country catching any show I could ...


before 16 road trips consisted of my mom, dad, brother and I ... one in particular I spent the entire trip riding around the east coast listen to Soft Cell till I actually wore the tape out ... then spent the rest of the trip begging to stop at a record store so I could get a new copy ...


after 16 I did something I had dreamed of most of my life ... I got in my car in New York and drove alone to California and had an absolute blast ... it was the most empowering trip I ever made ...


before 16 if I wanted a frozen yogurt [my coffee of adolescence] I would have to beg someone to take me to Fashion Island to get a Heidi's Frogen Yozart [cute name huh]


after 16 any time I wanted a Starbucks I would cart myself to the store ...


before 16 I had to take the Big Yellow Animal Wagon to school each day ...


after 16 I drove myself and my best friend to school each day ...


before 16 if I were to go out with a guy we either had to hang out at home or get one of our parents to drop us off and pick us up somewhere ...


after 16 I could spend the evening making out in my car ...


before 16 my dad took me to work every Saturday and Sunday morning and picked me up at the end of the day ...


after 16 I could get a job anywhere I wanted cause I could get there myself anytime I needed to be there ...


I would say at 15 I was pretty smart to know life would change for the better once I had a license ... it provided me such an opportunity to experience things on my own ... to make my own choices ... and to see all that was out there ... next month I will finally have been driving longer than not ...


damn I am getting old

These are entries to a competition asking for a rhyme

with the most romantic first line.....but least romantic second line:


Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss

but I only slept with you, because I was pissed


I thought that I could love no other

Until, that is, I met your brother


Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.

But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's empty

and so is your head.


Of loving beauty you float with grace

If only you could hide your face


Kind, intelligent, loving and hot

This describes everything you are not


I want to feel your sweet embrace

But don't take that paper bag off of your face


I love your smile, your face, and your eyes-

Damn, I'm good at telling lies!


My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:

Marrying you screwed up my life


I see your face when I am dreaming

That's why I always wake up screaming


My love you take my breath away

What have you stepped in to smell this way


My feelings for you no words can tell

Except for maybe "go to hell"


What inspired this amorous rhyme?

Two parts vodka, one part lime.

It was 1989 ... February 3rd to be exact and in a month I would be 20 ... I had met Brian in August when I moved into Hashinger Hall ... we both lived on the 7th floor ... boys to the right of the elevator ... girls to the left ... at the time I thought he was the most beautiful man I had ever seen ... as we got to know each other he also became one of the most aware and kindest men I had known ... I am not sure if what we had was a courtship or a friendship ... I just knew we spent every moment together for 6 long months and I loved every minute of it ... and he knew it ... he also knew I was a virgin ...


on February 3rd I went out with some friends to ladies night at some completely machismo bar ... I got kicked out that night for drinking beer out of the pitcher which I found quite ridiculous ... but guessed later it was because they didn't wash them all that well ... nice place ...


when I got home there was a note on my door that said "Call me ... I miss you ... B" ... I sware my heart skipped a beat ... it hadn't been quite a month since our first kiss ... and I was quite inexperienced with men but Brian knew all this ... and it made me comfortable ... I put on my favorite white cotton babydoll nightgown and called Brian ... it was only moments before he was opening my door ... we sat on my bed and talked for what seemed like ages ... while he played with my hair ... it was perfect ... I had colored Christmas lights wrapped around the exposed pipes on my ceiling and the warm pink huge always made me feel giddy ...


I turned to him and said ... "there is no one in the world I would rather experience my first time with than you' ... I can still see his smile ... I knew he was waiting for me to say something because he never wanted to feel he pushed me into having sex ...


I was so nervous and so comfortable all at the same time ... I remember thinking this is the closest I have ever been to another human being ... his body was so warm ... and he cradled me in his arms ... even the sting of pain wasn't so bad ...


we fell asleep like that ... and it was also the first time I had spent the night in someone's arms ... I remember not being able to stop smiling the next day ... and the moment Heather saw me she knew ... and gave me a huge hug and said ... "I am so happy your first time is making you smile so" ...


tomorrow will be 14 years since I lost my virginity ... some days it seems as if it were yesterday ...

Since we moved in last Friday finding a place for our CDs has been driving me crazy ... the basement of my parents house came with bookcases ... nice big ones that held all our books ... so our bookshelves from New York were turned into CD shelves ... well now we live here and it doesn't come with book shelves and the entertainment center we got isn't really built for books or CDs ... so our books must go in the bedroom


I am babbling ... anyway it has been driving me crazy to find a place for about 300 CDs ... when you combine two full collections it is crazy ... not to mention I worked in a record store for 10 years ... I figured it isn't really a status symbol to display all your CDs like it was in the 80's so tonight we bought notebooks ... 2 of them that hold 200 CDs each ... and I just spent 4 hours putting all our CDs into the two notebooks ...


front cover in the slot first ... then the CD ... store the cases that are good [they are great for computer CDs] and throw away any of them that are crappy ... I can't believe how great it is using the notebooks ... I am so impressed with the space I am saving ... not to mention I won't have to dust them ... there won't be cases laying all over the place ... and the notebooks have shoulder straps ... so we can grab one and go when we want to listen to something in the car ... or take them to work so everyone can burn copies ... it is so cool ...


I am really working hard at utilizing the space we have ... and ... getting rid of shit ... the more I throw away the more I want to get rid of ...


I am not getting rid of everything ... I did find my rainbow glasses from my favorite Dead show ... and this little plastic harmonica I played with throughout the day ... that stuff I keep ... but the goofy paper glasses in the shape of 2000 for New Year's Eve ... those were chucked ... for sure ... I don't see me ever wearing those again ...


the rainbow ones were just beautiful out on the balcony last night ... looking at the street lights ... ahhhh what fond memories those bring back ... for anyone that may have been there it was the July 4th show, 1990 in Kansas City ... what a fucking awesome day ...

I like this new blog I found from a link in my comments ... totally different than most and quite soothing to read ... I suggest taking a bit of time to check out Mott Cromby